Dude, Where's Our Sense of Wonder?

Is it possible that the popularity of belief systems such as Wicca, neo-paganism, and neo-witchcraft are a revolt against the modern times we live in where almost every phenomenon that used to be thought of as magical and vast in its mysterious unknowability can be explained away by the BELIEF SYSTEM called science-- indeed, is a belief in fae folk and whispering trees in the forest dappled with liquid sunlight a much needed balm against the tragedy of our modern society's general lack of wonder? Me personally, I cultivate my sense of wonder, that could easily compete with any 5-year-old child's, with my art, and also because I have been insane I have experienced first-hand different realities than the dominant culture's version of reality, and although the science of psychiatry can explain away those realities with the pat labeling of them as symptoms of schizo-affective disorder-- and, even though on a practical and, more to the point, day-to-day level, I know this label is true-- it doesn't change the authenticity and soul-flight truth of those alternative realities, at least in terms of how they were experienced at the time. I don't want this post to sound anti-psychiatry-- I really, really like not hearing voices or thinking "They" are "out to get me"-- I'm just saying, on a certain level, if I felt something, it was real, or at least it was real at the time. But that doesn't mean I want it to be my permanent reality, particularly because most of it was terrifying. But part of the sense of wonder I experience now because of having been insane, even after all the psychotherapy and medication, is that if I open certain doors in my mind I can LOOK AT realities I've experienced in the past; I can look at them, even if I don't walk into the room.

The Return of the Goddess (To Me)

This video is called "Clementine Cannibal Talks About Being a Witch." A link to another one of her videos which is about the return of the Goddess is below.

The beginning of the following text is an email I wrote to Clementine about identifying as a witch. I know this post is a lot of Clementine Cannibal, but I'm still working to find my own voice as a witch, to figure out if I even am a witch by the perimeters I outline below, so I'll be using other people's words a lot until I'm better able to articulate this on my own.

I was raised, and to some extent still identify as, Catholic. But I have dabbled in Wicca [a form of witchcraft]. But it’s interesting, because the Catholic Mother Mary, to me, is a big manifestation of the Goddess. It’s no secret that the early Catholic church "recruited" the visage of Mother Mary to get pagan converts. But in my spiritual journey, Goddesses from other belief systems, like the Greek Hekate, the Hindu Kali, and the Buddhist Quan Yin have come to me. While I admit it’s a form of cultural appropriation, these faces of the Goddess have taught me things.

Also:
I believe that the Goddess has returned, because I've been waking up. I quit smoking cigarettes over 3 months ago, I made a firm decision to stop ruminating over the past, and I've stopped shaving my armpits without worrying that it's a contradiction that I still shave my legs and pluck my eyebrows. (My husband loves the pit hair!) For more about the return of the Goddess, please see Clementine's video The Return of the Goddess or Demetra George's book Mysteries of the Dark Moon: The Healing Power of the Dark Goddess.

I think the main reason I haven't been identifying as a witch is that I'm not into ritual magic. The best rituals I've ever done were more like exercises in art therapy, wherein the artistic process transforms psychologically and spiritually, than they were casting spells. Sometimes I think taking a walk on a balmy summer night is magical enough! (Note: partially since I am now identifying as a witch and not Wiccan, I don't think I need to perform formal ritual magic to be a witch.) Some other ways I am a witch are that I really connect with the world and nature on a spiritual level through my art, I feel a really strong connection to the cycles of the moon embodying the cycle of life, death, and rebirth (as we also see in the seasons, and in contradiction to the predominant thinking of time as linear instead of cyclical) and as far as Christianity goes I feel a very strong connection to Mother Mary as a face of the Goddess.